Wednesday, December 21, 2005

I am blank..

Why do I go blank when I sit down to write a blog?!?! Beats me!!!

Relationships - they make you or break you!!! How do we handle bad relationships?? The sad part is we realise it is a bad relationship only when things start getting outta hands... and by the time we decide to call it off, the damage would have been done...

Human mind is the most complex thing ever known to man. No two persons think alike in this world... No two relationships are same either. The more we move with a person, the more we tend to like them. Familiarity is the essential ingredient in a relationship in its budding stages. This stage is called the "Out of sight, Out of mind - stage". This is when the first impression is made which decides the future of a relationship.

Then comes the "Wanna know you better - stage". This is when we get in touch with each other often and gradually get to know the other person. We compare our likes and dislikes. We decide whether we can handle the other person's thought-process, their likes and dislikes. This stage forms the foundation for any relationship.

Then comes the "Cant live without you - stage". This is the stage where people start getting possessive of the other. Expectations run high and girls start thinking about commitments and long-term plans... Days wont go well if we dont hear from the only person who means the world to us. Guys will be freaked out if girls bring up the topic of commitment - not ony at this stage, at any stage, unless they arent serious. If the guy start distancing himself from the girl after they discussed about commitment, it is better to let him go. He is not the kind to settle down with. If he decides to stick to you, but still doesnt wanna commit, give him another chance and wait as long enough as you can.

But, dont keep fooling yourself that you dont have any feelings for the other person, cos there will come a time when you have to take decisions for your life and you will be left in a lurch. Decide what you wanna do with the other person and then proceed. Otherwise, you will end up hurting yourself or the other person. Dont give the other person false hopes. After all, life should be hassle-free.

Then comes the "Life is good-stage". The more the relationship falls into a routine, the more you will be lulled by a feeling of security, till reality wakes you up with a jolt. I am trying not to be a pessimist about relationships, but reality bites, doesnt it?? Both of you are comfortable with each other and understand how the other person works and handle each other better. There will be some "Gosh!! Am I lucky or wat- days" and some "God!! Gimme a break- days" and life goes on like this.

Then comes a time when you have to really decide on the course of your life and ask the other person about their plans with you. This is called the "Please say Yes - stage". This stage might end in bliss or break-up which reminds me to talk about break-ups. Break-up teaches you to be stronger and makes you realise how strong you are. Let me tell you, you will be surprised to know how strong you are. Studies show that women are better people in handling emotional stress. But this doesnt mean that they are happy in moving on after a break-up. A break-up affects both the sexes equally. It is the extent to which we let it affect us, decides how we move on and how good we can handle it.

There is no point in prolonging a relationship which doesnt make you happy. There are two types of break-up according to me - the one that happens when you are still in love and the one that happens after you have started hating each other. The latter is easier to handle. The former leaves you traumatised... But, dont give up hopes. There is always a better person waiting for you. I dont believe in the thought..."Let go of a person. If they come back to you, they are yours. If they dont, they never were.."

Loving and losing are part of lessons life teaches us... Dont miss it. Lucky are the ones who learn it the hard way... Keep learning!!!

Ciao!!!

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